My Children Treat Me Like I Am Nothing After All My Sacrifices

My dear sister, reading your words feels like carrying part of your pain, and I want you to know that you are not alone. Many mothers silently go through this, but your voice matters and your tears are valid.

You must remember this truth: you are not a failure. Children can forget, children can turn ungrateful, but their behavior does not erase the sacrifices you made. Every tear you shed, every hunger you endured so they could eat, every prayer you prayed in the midnight hour — none of it was wasted. Heaven recorded it, and one day life itself will remind them who you are.

You see, some children only understand the depth of a mother’s love when they themselves face hardship, when they become parents, or when they lose what they took for granted. It is painful that you are disrespected now, but don’t allow that pain to reduce the queen that you are.

What you need now is boundaries and self-love. Loving your children does not mean allowing them to insult you. Respect is not a privilege, it is your right. Start by being firm when they cross the line. Let them know, calmly but clearly, that you will no longer tolerate being spoken to like a stranger. They may resist at first, but deep down they will begin to understand that their mother deserves honor.

Also, shift your focus a little. You have given them 29 years of sacrifice; now give yourself the gift of living. Join women’s fellowships, groups, or associations where your voice will be valued. Reconnect with friends you left behind because of motherhood. Learn a new skill, take a trip, dress up for yourself, smile for yourself. Life is not finished, my sister. You are only 47 — you still have many years to write a beautiful chapter that is about you, not just them.

Spiritually, keep covering them in prayer, but also pray for your own heart to heal. Ask God to strengthen you so that their words and actions do not destroy your spirit. Sometimes children are blind until God himself opens their eyes.

And never forget this: your children’s failure to appreciate you does not reduce your worth as a mother. You are a warrior, a nurturer, a pillar. You raised three adults from the dust with nothing but love, tears, and sacrifice. That is not a small thing. One day, when the reality of life humbles them, they will remember your value. And even if they don’t say it, heaven has already crowned you with honor.

So, my sister, keep loving them, but also start loving yourself. Do not let their rejection define your life. Walk tall, because you have done what many cannot do. May your latter years bring you joy, laughter, and true companionship — whether from friends, family, or even strangers who see your worth. You are not invisible, and you are not alone.

Below 👇 is the message I got..

Please hide my identity. I am 47 years old, and I feel broken inside as I write this. I have three children: my son is 29, my first daughter is 27, and my second daughter is 25. For years, I lived only for them. When their father abandoned me, I promised myself that I would never let my children suffer. I carried the weight of both mother and father on my shoulders. I worked in people’s shops, carried loads in the market, even did cleaning jobs that made my body ache, just so I could pay their school fees and put food on the table.

I never remarried because I didn’t want my children to feel neglected or think I chose another man over them. I buried my own dreams and happiness just to raise them. I thought they would grow up to appreciate me, to love me, to see me as their hero. But the reality is the opposite.

My son, the firstborn, treats me like a burden. If I call him to check up on him, he responds with irritation, sometimes even hanging up on me. When I try to advise him, he tells me I don’t know anything about life and that I should stop interfering. I carried him in my womb for nine months, I walked barefoot to pay his school fees, I prayed endlessly for him. And now, he barely even introduces me as his mother.

My first daughter… she blames me for every mistake in her life. If a relationship doesn’t work, she says it’s because I didn’t raise her with enough confidence. If she faces struggles, she says it’s because I didn’t do enough as a mother. She forgets how I went to bed hungry just so she could eat. She forgets the nights I tied wrappers around my waist and begged God to keep her alive when she was sick.

My last daughter… she behaves as if I don’t exist unless she needs money. She doesn’t greet me with respect, she barely speaks to me, and sometimes she talks to me like I am her age-mate. The most painful part is that all of them treat outsiders with more respect than they treat me. They call other people “aunty” and “mummy” with honor, but they don’t see the same value in me, their own mother.

Sometimes they mock me, calling me “old school” or saying I am not educated enough to understand their lives. They laugh at my accent, at my clothes, at the way I talk. It breaks me, because all I ever wanted was to see them succeed and become better than me.

Whenever I watch the Indian series Anupamaa, I cry. I see myself in her. The humiliation, the disrespect, the way children forget the woman who gave up everything for them. And like Anupamaa, I cannot disown them. No matter how they treat me, I still pray for them. I still cook for them when they come around. I still love them because they are my blood.

But my heart is weary. I keep asking myself: is this my reward after all these years of sacrifice? To be treated like nothing in the eyes of the children I raised with my life?

Please, I don’t know what to do anymore. Should I keep enduring this pain silently because I am their mother, or should I distance myself and live my life in peace? What advice do you have for me?

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